I live in the philippinnes and as you may have heard, they have a policy now where its perfectly legal for anyone to kill you if they suspect you of partaking in illegal drug activity. even if you dont get killed, getting caught will end up with serioussss jail time. it sounds soo far fetched but you can even look it up if you dont believe me.

well anyways, I used to smoke weed daily before i moved here but of course i gave it up once i arrived. i got to the point where if i smoked weed without being on xanax id get superrr paranoid and it was not a fun experience but everytiime the high wore off id be like "yeahh lets do that again" The way they treat drugs here did not help my paranoia at all

after a few months of being here I went with a friend to a place about 2 hours away from where i lived, we were staying at a house he owns for the next few days. this was my first time out in this country without being accompanied by a family member so i was all out on my own.

we start smoking and its great at first. I hadnt smoked in months so it felt like my first time all over again. i missed that feeling, it was soo great. now keep in mind, since i had never been high here before, when i finally did smoke, it put me back in my mindset of how id be high before i moved from america to this new place. im soo high in this house i never been to before and id be like "where the fuck am i.. oh yeah im at "x" house.. oh shit, im in the philippines! im on the other side of the world"

then after a while one of the people there kept saying "youre lucky you met us, and not some other people or you could be in danger" and he was right, because as a foreigner in a third world country, well you get the picture. but that was the wrong thing for me to hear because i then thought about it and rememered "i dont know where the fuck i am.. they could do anything to me and id have no way at all of escaping because i dont know where i am" and my paranoia took over and was thinking the worst. and what didnt help at all is that my one friend that took me there was soo baked out of his mind that all he could do was laugh hysterically and mutter a word here and there in between laughing. but to me i saw it as him laughing because they got me trapped here and knew what they were about to do to me.

and to top it all off, they were speaking in their native language which i dont understand, and that just let my brain jump to the wildest conclusions. it was the worst most mentally fucking exhausting day ive been through in soo long. they could tell something was wrong with me so they kept saying for me to go and sleep it off but i was too terrified out of my mind to go and sleep. it got to the point where i accepted my fate that i was gonna be killed that night and just wanted it to be over with already.

needless to say, they didnt kill me. i woke up the next day like wow i cant believe i thought all of that shit. ive had a few other paranoia scares from smoking after that but this post has already gotten too long