Mine not be AS relevant to the question as my husband and I were "recycled virgins". I was 28 and he was 32. We waited for religious reasons. We wanted to start off on a clean slate and the "right foot". We had seen each other naked and had done a little messing around in the months leading up to our marriage.
Our wedding night. Fun reception. Buddies bought him WHISKEY shots!!! Our wedding party walked with us along Lake Superior to our hotel. I could tell my husband was drunk, but I didn't realize how drunk until we got to the hotel. He could barely help me out of my dress so I could shower quick. I started to get upset and started to hope he had passed out by the time I got out of the shower ( I didn't want drunken fumblings on my wedding night!). Sure enough he was passed out in our suite when I got out. I was pissed. Couldn't believe it. I grabbed my pillow and a blanket and went to the couch. I was so angry and upset. Fast forward 2 hrs later (like 230 am) I hear a "click" and could have sworn it was the door closing. I rolled over and fell back asleep. An hour+ later I hear a knock on the door thinking (wtf?). It was 4ish. I opened the door and there stood my husband in his underwear and t-shirt. I just stood there looking at him and finally said "what are you doing out there? Did you leave??" He was almost speechless and hesitated and admitted he had, but had no idea why. Only thing he can think of is that he drunkenly woke up and found me missing and left to look for me. But that's not the end of it. He was so drunk that he literally just passed out cold while wandering down the hall. Fell down and when he woke, his glasses had fallen off of his face and landed next to him. He woke and could NOT remember our room number! So he had to walk down to the desk and ask.....and the desk guy asked for his ID and my husband had none (he was in his underwear) so the desk guy buys his story and tells him the room number but won't give him a key, that he can knock and I can choose to let him in.
And in the moment, as he stood there in his underwear staring at me....i realized I had a choice. How was I going to proceed? How was I gonna start my marriage off? I let him back in. We fell asleep together and made love that next morning. It was great. And I am glad we stuck with it and waited.it was the right decision for us.
For clarification we've now been married for almost 3 years and he's an amazing man! What happened on our wedding night was not typical. It was the fucking whiskey!!!! We now enjoy telling this debacle to our friends. I took the first step in a major way in forgiveness and grace...and he has shown the same to me 1000x over now:)