I see what you’re saying. But this is where I think the show is a bit too wrapped in it's own ideas about relationships sometimes.

sacrifice for the good of people you care about who would do the same for you

But not all sacrifices are done just out of love, OR with the expectation that the same would be done for you. Some sacrifices are done out of duty, or for someone who shouldn’t be expected to return the favor. Some people are willing to sacrifice for those they don’t even know. Is that a bad thing?

And not going there if you don't have to because working together could work out better

See, what it seemed Pearl was trying to teach Connie was about being someone’s protector rather than half of a fighting duo. They're clearly different things, and neither of them is necessarily "bad and wrong", just different. But then the show ‘strawmans’ Pearl’s position when it makes her seem irrational/suicidal, even though that was never her point.

I mean, it's great that Steven and Connie both have fighting ability, simmilar levels of fighting skill and complementary weapons, and that they synch so perfectly even without any training, and that they work as buds in a situation where they can afford to. It’s great for them! But that's certainly not the case for everybody. What then?

Back to the war: Any proper soldier/knight would risk their lives but not expect a general/liege (like the figurehead of a whole rebellion) to risk themselves to the same extent for them. That doesn’t mean they're dumb or suicidal, just aware of their place in a conflict situation.

And it seems THAT was what Pearl meant with her teachings. When she says “you shouldn't be near the fight, you're too important" to Rose, she’s right when you think about the context: Rose carrying an entire rebellion/army on her shoulders while Pearl didn’t.

The show looks at this in a purely ‘interpersonal relationship’ kind of way, but in a realistic situation there’s much more than that at play.