I mourned you for that first year. Do you have any idea how hard it was (and at times, still is) having to see you twice a week when I picked up our kids? To see a familiar face that brought so much warmth to me before, be so cold and trigger so much negativity in me at the same time. You were dead, but not. It was excruciating. I wish we had tried counseling. To say I was clueless is an understatement. I had the viewpoint that no relationship is without argument and that our marriage was not any different than that. I wish you had communicated your unhappiness to me better, and I wish I had listened. A lot of our problems were brought on by assumptions of the other's thoughts, and the general lack of communication when it was most important. I begged you for counseling before the end, but you had already made up your mind. You told me right after we separated that you would always love me. I was so stunned by the whole thing, that I never got to say - "but what good does that do if you no longer want to be with me?" I felt like the statement you made was the exact opposite of what you felt. A few years later, I've mostly healed. While you seem to be doing well, I've noticed that you've gone through boyfriend after boyfriend. I've had two girlfriends, and I knew right away that I did not love them and could not. They were not you. We were inseparable from the moment we met until the day we split up, a little over 8 years later. We had something special, and when things got tough, you bailed. I wish it had turned out differently, but have learned that it was ultimately for the best. It does not stop me from occasionally grieving for you. I don't hate you. I wish that I did. It would be so much easier.

In my typical fashion, here is a song by someone else that explains how I feel about it.

(My ex is most likely not on reddit, will not read this, but thank you OP for letting me type this up.)