He is a hard worker, he works 9-12 hour shifts 6 hours daily (again, startup) and programs all the time. Additionally, sometimes he will goof off and chat with me in between. Also while he works at home he invites me over and I'll rub his back and just relax/chill in the room while he's working. He's a hard worker who sometimes goofs off.
The centre of attention thing seems like you're just biased against me and you're going to start picking out anything I say out of all of my paragraphs and attacking me for it.
He goes out with his friends all the time, I do not care. I give him space. It's often. It's very normal and normally he respectfully texts me like hey babe! or miss you! or sends photos of the food and stuff. The way he went out of his way for her was very odd and he's never done that for me even though I have been in town near his work often. He had a two hour lunch with her and took it as time off.
It was a Thursday evening. He went home early because they travel and do things on Friday. He wasn't working in the 3+ hours he didn't text me. He was home by that time doing computer stuff. After he replied I directly said "(blah blah stuff about my day) and what have you been up to sweetie? Miss you!" and he just said he was chatting with his coworker at the hotel that he was rooming with and chilling.
You're assuming things that are absolutely wrong, honestly. But go ahead, claim it's because I wasn't the "centre of attention." No. It was because I was blatantly ignored in favor of him treating another girl to a dinner to which she romantically labeled with many photos of said date and to which he callously placed his entire daily as more important than doing the one thing I requested of him on the only long trip I've taken since we've been dating in comparison to him always wanting me to chat while he's on trips (4 hours, half the time of mine) with his coworkers and we will have hugely long convos because I love him and don't mind chatting and texting to him while he goes on the business trips.
Anyways whatever, the effort is pointless. It's clear I'm 100% fully in the wrong and just absolutely jealous. I don't even know what the effort of this post was as you're just going to nitpick a sentence or two and make grossly incorrect assumptions.
In relation to this issue: we've already discussed it. It was resolved. I fully apologized and admitted my mistake in being upset. I clarified my feelings to which he acknowledged and understood and apologized after I had apologized. We then cuddled and made up. I just have noticed he seems to have some boundary issues that have come up repeatedly yet any time it's mentioned it seems I'm just painted as the jealous one and my feelings are always pushed aside so that I can apologize and make him feel better for being upset over these things (both when I instigated and he instigated.) I've just wanted outside perspectives and constructive criticism, not a deconstruction of everything I've done wrong and why I'm a jealous and shitty gf who you would extra hardcore dump if you were my bf. it's not advice, just serves to hurt my feelings and make me feel worse about something I already felt guilty for and apologized over and acknowledged my wrongdoings.