how did you go out of your way?

My parents have only visited me once, I have travelled to them many times. Any birthdays, events, anything, you have to go out of the way for them. Got children? They wont go to you, you go to them (my siblings situation). Every birthday I have had had either been cancelled cause she decided to drink or we do what she wants to do and ignore your wishes. Even on a normal day, if M drinks I would have to cancel all plans too look after her. So that is what I mean.

i thought it was easier for you if she comes to you, as she was currently doing?

Sorry but did you miss what I said? That was the plan since we agreed to do it last week but now, the day before, M wants to cancel everything and get me and BF to travel. My BF is now working late and they want me to catch trains, they can drive.

how exactly did you waste any money at this point??

We went shopping for food and drink specifically for this visit. Me and BF dont drink non alcoholic or alcoholic drinks and the food is specifically for my parents (they are fussy eaters), it was a lot. They were meant to be spending the day with me so we got plenty for them... now they arent coming so not only have they wasted money on food and drink we wont even have but expected us to spend more on fuel to only spend an hour at theirs...