Yeah sounds like divorce is brewing. You just said you don't view her and you other children as a priority in her eyes. YTA for being lazy about trying to come up with a creative solution to this like having your daughter talk to SeaWorld or going to an educational session there so she can get more insight. This absolutely could be a manipulate move on her end too purposely sabotaging something your wife wants to do. I don't think it's obvious, I can understand her stance but there are other solutions here but again, you kinda dug your own grave especially since you think one daughter holds priority over the other kids just because she was born first. I feel bad for your wife and kids, I'm not sure how you would rebuild trust with your wife. I hope the best for you, crazy how small things can blow up!