You see a vast and significant love story that is no more. He sees a man that would have kept him from you, if he had only come home...a man that you might still choose because you chose him first.

There’s no logic here, just pain for everyone involved.

NTA.

A gentle discussion about how all of our relationships shape who we are. Without that love, you wouldn’t be the woman he loves enough to hope for forever with. Your former fiancé is a piece of the puzzle that you are, a puzzle that now and forever will be shaped by him (your future husband). Removing former fiancés name from your skin won’t change the importance of his place in the story of you, but doing so would -to you - change the picture in the puzzle enough that you would feel like you were lying to yourself about who you are.

You love fiancé and the picture you two will build together will be a story and adventure grander than anything imaginable, but the foundations of that life matter too.

I’m sorry for your loss OP, and for the situation you now find yourself in.