The parties seemed to always continue, no matter how many times we'd tell him to knock it off and it got to where he would blame us: "So you guys have your friends over, but I can't have mine?" "Well yea... it's our house. And we had 4 friends over for dinner. You invited half the bar back to our house at 2 am.." He never seemed to get it, and his girlfriend by this point was pretty much a full-time resident as well. Their relationship was very volatile and they both were combative with each other. It was incredibly awkward to be around.
So, my fiancee decides to start having weekly meetings, making sure he was looking for work and seeing how things are going in his life. During these meetings, he'd always give the right answers - he's looking for work, he's saving money, he knows of an apartment that's opening up in a week... But nothing ever seemed to materialize. By now, I realize we're being taken advantage of, but my fiancee has a good heart and doesn't want to kick him to the curb. She says he's made improvements (which he slightly has), and we don't need the money, so the fact that he isn't paying rent shouldn't be a big deal. "Yea, but he's got tons of money to drink and party - because he's not paying rent!". Still, she wants to give him some more time.
Finally, I set a deadline - this has been going on for almost a year and things haven't changed. He's still broke, he's still drinking every day, he is working, but only barely. His girlfriend is still staying at our house 3-4 nights a week (even though she owns her own condo) and my fiancee and my relationship is on thin ice. I tell her that he's got until the first anniversary to get his shit and move out. On that date, he is gone or I'm gone. My fiancee is very upset with me, but she understands, so we both tell him.
Miraculously, the week before he's about to be evicted, his bar manager has a spare room and he's going to move in there. Again, we never charged him anything and told him anything he'd "saved" (yea right) to use on his new apartment. He disappears for a few days, although his stuff is still in our house. I'd get daily texts from him "Hey I'm trying to get my stuff but its raining today man lol i'll get it all tomorrow i promise". This goes on for 2 weeks and we don't see him, yet he's occupying a room in our house with our stuff. Every day, a new text - and the stuff doesn't move. Finally, it's like 2 days after his anniversary since moving in and I've had it. I tell him we've been more than patient with him and that if he doesn't get it, I'm taking it all to the dump. Okay, he says - he'll get it tomorrow.
Next day, I come home for lunch and find him passed out drunk on our couch. I slammed the shit out of my door and woke him up. "Ohh, hey - you talk to (my fiancee)?" I tell him no and he tells me there's been a problem. By now, it's been a year worth of problems I'm tired of hearing them. He tells me he's got to go to work, but he's coming back to the house later - he's cleared it with my fiancee and he'll tell me the whole story later. I am fucking livid and can't believe my fiancee would okay him coming back. I call her and she and I get in a huge fight. She's telling me that I don't understand and I need to hear his story, but she's sworn to secrecy and can't tell me herself. I go to the gym, then get dinner and drove around for 4-5 hours, just debating what my next move is. I come home and sure enough, his car is at our house.
I walk in and catch them in the middle of a conversation and they immediately quieted down when I walked in. She announces that he's got something to tell me, so I sit down, my blood boiling. He proceeds to tell me that the previous night he was at work and they'd hired a new bartender. He was training her and they talked the whole night and then he invited her over to his new place after work. They went there and continued drinking and he doesn't know what happened, but he woke up in the morning and they were both naked and she was screaming, saying that she'd been raped. His roommate/boss kicked him out of the house and he was immediately picked up by the cops. He swears that he didn't rape her, he didn't have sex with her and he told the cops the same thing. Then, after further prodding, he admits that they did have sex, but she was awake and consented "but don't tell the cops - I told them we didn't do anything". I'm calling him a fucking idiot and telling him to get the fuck out of our house, my fiancee is crying and he's saying he can't leave or go anywhere. He's got strict orders to stay "home" until the DNA swab test thing comes back and surprise - he told them our house was his home.
Now, my fiancee and I do party, but we walk a pretty straight line, except for that like a lot of people, we smoke weed. The first thing I thought of when he's telling me this is that the cops are coming to my house and they're going to find the weed. So, I start rounding up all the weed, bowls, bongs and extracurriculars and putting them in my car. My fiancee and he are both saying I'm crazy, nobody is coming to our house and I need to just calm down, but I'm not listening anymore and admittedly, I was out of control pissed off by this point, so I really wasn't in my right mind. I drove every single thing to my best friend's house and put it in his closet and spent the night there to calm down. I go to work and then come home after work.
Surprise - he's still there. He's on the couch, drunk again, and our house looks like it's been ransacked. I ask him what the hell is going on and this time he tells me "man you're smart. the cops came here today to ask me some questions. They asked if they could look around and I told them yea, so they were looking for that weed I guess. Good thing you moved that shit." - like it's my fault all this is going on. Once again, I'm ballistic and about to explode. He's telling me that everything is cool, he talked to my fiancee and she's okay with everything and that I just need to calm down. I'm in a panic mode - I don't know what to do and I feel like my life is all out of control, and because of some guy I had nothing to do with. So, once again I leave and spend night two at my friends house. Come home the third day and he's gone. My fiancee is there and tells me that he called her that day - the cops picked him up and arrested him for rape. (big surprise, since he was caught in a lie). She thinks he's gone for good, but doesn't know what the next step is. We don't hear anything for a few days and then we get a call from some out of town number - it's his mom. She's caught wind of the whole thing and is bonding him out of jail, but she says she doesn't want him living with her and that she wants him to stay with us. I tell her absolutely not, and that he's never coming back... Then, the next day he comes back - he's bonded out, but has an ankle bracelet on. And terms of his bond is that he's on house arrest and can't leave - OUR HOUSE. So, at that point, I spent the entire next day calling judges, solicitors, cops - anyone that I could talk to. I explained the situation, how we were involved and that I didn't want a rapist staying in our house. I get home to this long letter where he pours his heart out and says he's sorry he lied and disrespected us, but please don't make him leave - it was the best place he'd ever lived and we were the nicest people he'd ever met. However I coud not care less and felt like I'd been victimized in the worst way for a year. Indeed, all his stuff was gone - he took it with him and we've never heard from him again. I immediately changed all the locks and never looked back. That was 2 years ago and to this day I have no idea what ever happened to him - I've never been contacted by him or the police since.
So... sorry for the novel - but THAT is what a bad roommate is all about.
TL; DR - fiancee invited alcoholic bum to move in and shit goes haywire. And yes, that story is 100% true.