I felt pretty doomed too. Mostly I think it stopped me from getting help faster because I got caught up in the whole "am I a real alcoholic?" question. I was told that people should try abstaining for 30 days to test if they were alcoholic, which I did and managed to make it through... and then went right back to daily drinking. So... what the hell did that mean?
I suffered for a bit longer and then hit on the idea of tapering and moderating, which went a lot better because I felt I was learning along the way. But once I'd done that I knew I needed to take a real break. Alcohol, on a fundamental level, wasn't my problem. I was my problem. I just needed to be sober enough to deal with my issues. So then I did a second 30 days, and kept adding to it because I could feel I hadn't resolved everything.
I was actually pretty happy abstaining, but the anxiety of 'slipping up' kept growing and growing. The thought that I'd eat a rumball and helplessly find myself right back where I started was weighing on me. That, and the desire to be able to socialize like a normal person, motivated me to see if I was changed enough as a person to change my relationship with alcohol. So I had a friend sit with me with a tiny glass of wine and tried A Drink. It was so-so. I didn't go nuts, didn't want more. And that's how I gradually started to moderate again.
I think I wrote out the 'guidelines' in another reply on this thread. I also wrote a book about my experiences, that you can get for free today on Amazon.
30 Days sober - http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B017GFVF14 Re-think Your Drinking -http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B010KHL51K
aaaand I have a blog called moderatelysober.com because writing was apparently one of things I needed to start doing again in my life! :)