Anyone else have a "fear" of eating junk food?

I consider myself a recovering junkaholic. I already tried just limiting my intake of junk food to a reasonable amount. It didn't work. One cookie turns into 1 cookie every few weeks, into a cookie every few days, several a day ...and next thing I know I'm back to binging on junk food again, and sicker and heavier than before. No thanks.

It's all very insidious. I eat one single bite and that's it. And I think I've gotten away with it. But I didn't. Each bite erodes my self-discipline, and makes the cravings and temptations stronger, not weaker. It is so similar to a drug addiction.

I ended up in the hospital from severe agonizing indigestion that turned out to be from eating junk food. Since I've already proved I can't just eat limited quanties, I quit cold turkey and eat none at all. I've lost 45 pounds since my peak. And I haven't had a single case of indigestion since.

I wouldn't call it fear, exactly. It's that...every time I see junk food now, I remember writhing on the floor in agony, vomiting, diarrhea, nausea, gas, worst pain I have ever experienced in my life, thinking I was dying. No. I'm not doing that to myself again. The stuff is poison to me, like rat poison.

And rat poison tastes great to rats. They love that stuff. But it means a slow agonizing death. No thanks.

I've seen too many stories about drug addicts trying to quit and relapsing over and over, causing incredible amounts of bad drama for everyone. No. I don't want to be like that. I've already done the yo-yo weight thing. Never ever again.

Some people can indulge lightly, without a problem--more power to them. I'm not one of them. I'm a former junkaholic. I can't, so I don't.

I don't know that I'd call it fear, exactly. Just a refusal to do something stupid that will hurt me in all kinds of ways, and destroy a lot of hard work in rebuilding my health, my looks, and my self-esteem. I'm much happier without the junk food. I don't ever want to go back to the way I was. And one single bite, or one sip, to me is a gateway back to hell.

A box of rat poison doesn't scare me. But I'm not eating it. No matter how good it tastes.

/r/loseit Thread