Anyone else feel like drugs alter their sexual preference?

Nope, and I don't believe sex on drugs is at all healthy either, but just to get extremely honest for a minute...

I'm a lesbian girl with a ton of a certain type of internalized homophobia. See, unfortunately I was born with a Y chromosome. I'm not thrilled about that, but it is what it is and I've never had a problem with my genitalia, which...I'm ashamed to say...I engage with...in certain ways...in bed. My sexuality is difficult to explain, few people get it, I don't want people questioning my gender over it, it's incredibly isolating, and I feel so much intense shame over it that it affects my quality of life. Recently I've been feeling so repulsive and disgusting over it that I've literally been self-harming (cutting) whenever I've felt sexual/aroused.

Being sedated/under the influence of the drugs I take is, sadly, the only thing that removes those feelings of self-loathing over my actual sexuality enough for me to feel okay and breathe for a while in that regard. It lets me actually fantasize about things and feel sexual without feeling like scum. In the last relationship I had, taking Lyrica allowed me to have the necessary conversations about it on the phone without freezing up and/or breakinf down into tears. It facilitated that intimacy by disinhibiting me enough to bring the truth of my inclinations to the surface.

So for me it doesn't change my preferences/orientation, no, but it helps me reveal that by letting me feel like I deserve to have a sexuality at all the way I am, and that I'm not warped, broken, or less of a woman for it.

/r/Drugs Thread