You see. That right there is why you struggle get a relationship or any guy to commit. This is what needs to be addressed and where you must focus.
Looks, education, money, commonalities,... are indeed superficial. They always are. Any therapist or social psychologist in the world will agree with me on what I have to say. It is also what I have said repeatedly but you seem to be stubborn that you overlook or not even think about it. IT IS LESS ABOUT WHO WE ARE THAN WHAT WE DO.
You can meet guys who are poor, rich, handsome, hideous, white, black, graduate, dropout, religious, atheist, extrovert, introvert, body builder, comic book afficionado,.... But none of these significantly contribute to chemistry. This doesn't show how the person will treat you. And that's ultimately what chemistry is founded upon, how do or will they treat you as a person...as their partner? How well do you treat each other?
I've mentioned this in my past PM. The question isn't a perfect solution. In fact, any advice must be taken with a pinch of salt. What works for one person may not work for another. What truly works is molding advice into something unique and that works for you. BTW, you bonded over "dislike dating" because you fell for a mirroring tactic. Hookup-ers genuinely know enough to mimic women's likes and dislikes. BUT I told you to check out if their body/face language opposes what they said. AND I told you to lie first by saying you love singles + dating then pop the question. If he says or copies similar, then he is a hookup-er.
You still dodged my question. In other words, did their face/body language oppose/confirm what they verbally said? Example of oppose is a guy saying he likes X but gives a cluster of "No" gestures including the head shake. His body contradicts what he speaks.
And shy guys are awesome. They are inexperienced in dating. Like me, you probably started dating since your teenage years. All shy men I know, from hardcore gamers to comic bookies, started asking out (or touching) a female of similar age AFTER TURNING 25. Like you and everyone else, Shy guys also want relationships and hate doing pickup. Their inexperience makes them sensitive which ultimately makes the dating game brutal. Comics and games are their solace. It's unpredictable when they try again. But, especially here in Reddit, I tell them that the their woman is out there. They may clueless from years of nondating. But she will be patient enough to make it work and teach a few things. You didn't like your shy guys. If you did, then you would've patiently stuck around to teach and turn them into the man both of you dreamed of.
I disagree about relevancy. It is 80-90% relevant and accurate. The man and woman weren't a couple. She came with friends who left her alone. The guy saw an opportunity and took it asap (before me too). And also, you weren't there. You never saw how oblivious the woman was when that guy laughed and what else he did before he left. But my point was is how well do you see the bigger picture or grand scheme of things?
I'll skip and just ask you to stop with the "woe is me" mindset. Nobody likes it, man or woman. You met a bunch of bad men. You neither had the patience nor chemistry to stick around for some. The rest were genuinely bad men. But it doesn't mean you should harshly judge men or give up trying certain methods. Persistence is key. When the time comes, you will meet your man. He will probably unexpected in every way possible.