Do you believe in the saying “Once a cheater, always a cheater”?

I wouldn’t say so. As for example, I was very, very unhappy in my previous relationship (aka no common interests, different lifestyle, no “understanding” of each other’s needs, dead bedroom and so on). I have ended it many times, but was afraid to leave due to several reasons and circumstances by that time. During one of those “off”-times I cheated twice. I was craving for someone who values me, understands me and would listen to my opinions (and not belittling me eg for my family, my job, my friends, eating habits etc). My AP who used to be my best friend and former colleague was in the same situation by that time, in top his ex was a narcissistic abuser. Well… it happened twice. After the second time we both decided to end our relationships independently from each other and stopped talking (I changed jobs hence we didn’t see us everyday as we used to). Long story short: almost one year of our second “cheating” we met again and since then we are inseparable (wedding in 2023). I would never ever cheat on him, no matter what. He is the one I can’t live without, my better half. There is simply no “need” for cheating, for fulfilling my needs with someone else.

So imho it all depends on circumstances. Once a cheater does not mean always a cheater.

/r/relationship_advice Thread