School insisted that get diagnosed with ADD. I was, at the age of six. Parents didn't do shit. They're DEPRESSION stop being depressed type 'folks. If you can't even have a basic theory of mind why would you have kids?
Allowing a mental illness to rough shot a developing mind is no different from giving them alcohol or drugs. Since then I've developed a litany of comorbidities. One of them even being a high drug tolerance cause the constant anxiety has maladaptively changed my body. None of the handful drugs for depression I've tried that you can be prescribed online worked one iota. Kratom I have to take minimum 20grams for europhia. And Vape pens just don't work. So to get prescription I'm probably gonna have a lot of tests and I can barely manage to get my butt once to see someone. Never mind paying for all this shit out of pocket cause I'm not even gonna both with insurance.
We give people Deus Ex Machine privileges to make people out of their lions like movie Sauron pulling orcs out of the mud for his army(that's what it looked like. Lore videos even for the movie's say this wasnt the case?) but cant think of giving people no strings attached free healthcare? Idk.
Thanks to the ER I learned that I have diabetes and thanks to my DID(Dissociative Indentity Disorder) Im not gonna even bother with Insulin. I forget to eat a meal? I'm fucked, as far as I know that how it goes. Having monitor the food I eat, the only somewhat constitent joy in my life. Uhmm...no
Pricking your finger everyday or having to wear a expensive monitor? Siding more to ladder cause my bodies so maladaptive it will probably just randomly spike my sugar which is kinda what happened. What a mess. I don't want anything to do with it. My body integrity is the only thing I have. I've been suicidal for awhile as you can imagine so it's an old friend anyways.
Its been nearly a year since. I've been living in a paid for apartment for the last two years away from my abusive family so I'm crossing my fingers that perhaps when my mental health improves my diabetes will be staved off as my body works more normally. That's the only silver lining available for me.