I can give you another more personal story. I waited til marriage like a good little Christian man should. Because of that I married quite young and in retrospect, without much of a clue about who would make the best partner for me.

Turns out my wife had in indeed had some very negative views toward sex which came as a big shock to me. Within 6 months our sex life was dying and I spent 22 years in a very frustrating marriage that led to divorce. It was torturous for me, and extremely frustrating for her.

Scene 2 is that I remarried years ago to another woman who didn't grow up with the same beliefs even though we shared the same faith. This marriage is SO radically better than the first that I find it hard to believe that it's my life - it feels like I lived a separate life for those 22 years and it began as a completely new life when I met my soulmate.

Honestly, I regret my beliefs about premarital sex when I was growing up. I regret being so stringent and steadfast and I wish I had known then what I know now. I will never tell my kids/grandkids not to have sex before marriage, as a matter of fact I tell them they SHOULD because there IS such a thing as being sexually incompatible, even if other things aspects seem to work. But a marriage without a healthy sex life is frustrating at best, hellish at worst.