I feel this. I've completely isolated myself from others. My only friend and constant companion is my ED. When I truly have a conversation with another person I realize how utterly fucked up I am. I'm like a stunted adult. Everyone is talking about starting a family and their future plans and I am more worried about insuring I stick to my fast and eating at a deficit.

I literally have 0 real friends and have never been in a long term relationship. I am almost 30. My family encourages my ED habits and my Dr wasn't too consurned about it when I casually brought it up last time I saw her.

I know I cant go on like this much longer but what do I do? I would honestly rather kill myself than gain weight.