I was in a bar in NYC with a lot of friends who volunteered in '08 and '16. We had all the tv's on watching the results. Everyone was so excited, but at the same time, I had a knot in my stomach that had started after the Comey letter. Working in Pa that week, I saw firsthand, canvassing,how it dampened enthusiasm for her. I was still expecting her to win, however. I believe it was around 10 that it became obvious that it was over. There were a lot of tears all around, mixed with some in denial. I couldn't stay around to watch the inevitable, slow death of everyones dreams, seeing their disbelief and pain. I left and remember thinking I don't know what is worse. Her losing, or living in a country that would elect someone like him. Walking to the subway, the people's on the streets grief was like a cloud of fog, hanging over all of us. I heard comments like; does this mean our whole country is racist, and people voicing disbelief. I got on the subway and couples were leaning on each other, as if for strength. There was a little Hispanic boy crying, asking his parents what this was going to mean for them. When I got off, I threw up and it wasn't from drinking.
I really think a lot of people who had planned to vote Hillary just never made it to the polls on Election Day. It wasn't because they "weren't with her" anymore, but because they thought this email thing or other faux scandals would never end. That America's misogyny would never let her win. I think some just gave up, or I guess you could say, gave in. What people put Hillary through, is a stain on our country's history. Even people, supposedly on our side. Sanders, his supporters, the so called "liberal media", the FBI etc. I still get sad when I think of all the irrational hate towards her, that we are still seeing today.