Civilization exists because we can build appropriate walls between individuals.
Relationships are about wisely disassembling these walls.
Everyone is trying to figure all of this out. It's decision making and action in the face of uncertainty, which is also a definition for management, by the way.
We're all at different places in that process and moving at different speeds and we all have different histories (and preferences) of things that have made us what are are AT THIS INSTANT.
It's more or less impossible to get 100% accuracy about the mental state of someone you encounter. You have to make and test assumptions, or make assumptions and just act.
You both seem to be doing a little nose sniffing.... like cute puppies. Because you are puppies. Blameless, new creatures figuring out the world and trying to maintain comfort and safety.
Stating the obvious... nothing changes until you change something. You have to man up and act. It's as simple as telling the truth... i.e., "I really look forward to seeing you sometimes and am afraid to be forward, but I'd love to have coffee with you and maybe get to know you better. Would you like to do that?"
That's how you take a brick out of that wall. There are million ways.
Later on, other bricks like physical touch, admitting something embarrassing about yourself, removing an article of clothing, a hug or kiss, handholding.... baby steps that get you from civilized isolation to the promised land of safe togetherness.
That's kind of how it sort of works for some people. You don't sound like a psychopath, so I'm assuming (see what I did there?) that you are a normal person, with normal goals and fears, but are brave enough to take an action, even if it's tiny and tenuous?
It's OK to act. It's not OK to make someone uncomfortable. You sometimes have to be the actor. Do it considerately, is my mantra. Accept and tolerate rejection. It's not personal, but it is possible. It's what most of us fear.
Advice? Do not spend your life in fear or indefinitely postponing action until you have all the info. Risk something. Don't let failure, even repeated failure, talk you into not risking something.
Be decent and sensitive with people like her. She's obviously got a bigger struggle than you, but she's ballsier than you... she forces out those actions. Hands you a hard won cookie. That was a risk and a costly thing for her. An admission of interest from a very shy and scared woman.
You can't have much of a party if everyone is an active listener. You have to have at least one talker. One initiator.
Caveat: Relationships are about growth and acceptance. That includes the relationship you are having with yourself. (You show signs of growth, by the way, IMHO.)
Good luck. Report back, maybe?