Awwwww. Big hug. Tremendous love coming your way! NP make us feel like we are worthless and misfits. It sucks that many of us have spent our lives believing what our MI NPs say to us. They are too far gone mentally to even know us, let alone define us, that’s for sure!! I hope you have a place to stay. I moved in with my bf and felt safe again. I chose the right guy who gives me precious eye contact to this day after 22 years of marriage. It’s okay you didn’t know all of this—none of us did as children, even though we knew as kids how fu our treatment was. We were indoctrinated by the manipulations of the N. Like removing myself from a cult of two, I credit my friends, husband and anyone who validated that the treatment we endured was not normal. You’ve got this. Leave and you will be able to breathe again and reclaim yourself. So glad you reached out….