Probably because she isn't sorry and she took me for granted for over fifteen years and used me every chance she got. It took me a long time to realize she was never really my friend to begin with. I was just an empathetic sucker and couldn't see past her fake words to the reality of her actions, or lack there of. Saddest day of my life was realizing she never really loved me, I was just her giving tree. She never once apologized, never once owned her horrible behavior and disappeared entirely from my life as if I did something wrong the couple times I attempted to confront her about her behavior. Granted, someone can't use you unless you let them. So, I stopped letting her.