Thank you, it's useful to hear from someone's perspective that can somewhat relate to my bf's. It has never bothered me that he was a virgin when we met but I knew it bothered him, so that's a good point you make about the power I unknowingly wield.

He was very sweet when I met him, but only very recently did I discover his bad temper. He's not violent, but if he someone he trusts doesn't do "right by him", he pretty much does everything he can via email, facebook to ruin their lives. An example was one of his friends failed to finish her half of a school assignment because her sister was in the hospital in critical condition after a major car accident. Please note the friend did most of her half of the assignment, but just failed to finish it to completion because of the emergency. They got a bad grade as a result, and my bf then messaged his friend's very conservative Christian family: sister and mom (with a fake facebook account) and told them that she smokes a whole lot of weed, is a speed freak, and goes to raves weekly. This was a huge exaggeration of what the friend actually does. The friend did smoke weed on occasion, and went to a rave once. This really blew my mind because it just seems so unlike him. But I heard it straight from him, and verified with the girl (who I am friends with on facebook).

My boyfriend knows that getting this new job was a huge deal for me since I was unemployed for over a year, and I was failing to get interviews. He actually didn't help me forge the documents to get me my current job, that was all me and I feel horrible about it. I'm afraid he could anonymously email my boss or HR about what I did, and he could get away with ratting on me since they wouldn't know it was him. He did recommend me, but even if he develops a bad reputation.. if I would still lose my job, and I'd be fucked again since I may be looking at being unemployed for a long time again.

On that note, I will consider trying some of the things you said to help me with this process.