Got a friend that's my fwb on the low and a few weeks ago she got wasted and we had a huge falling out. I'll admit I did have a hand in it as well. I have a terrible time admitting how I'm feeling / talking about feelings so that took a toll on things from my end. Her friends put the battery in her back one night when we were out to press me and ask a bunch questions and boom. I used to like the idea of it and hanging out with her and being with her but now I feel kind of numb about it. I was really hurt that she blew up at me because I didn't know she felt so upset. It all stemmed from us wanting different things a number of months back. She wanted a relationship, I didn't. She was upset then as well, she said we could continue as we were. I flat out asked her "are you sure? I don't want you losing sleep over me" she said yes then we get into a giant fight for like two weeks then stop talking. I shot her an msg wishing her luck on the exams for med school regardless of where we stood with eachother. She hits me up because she going to be in town and wants me to come hang out. Idk what to do so I don't respond. I do meet up with her the next day, and tried to have a candid talk about what happened but not much came from it. She pretty much acted as if it had all blown over. As much as I want get back in the swing of things, it's been nagging the fuck out of me that this happened. Like when she doesn't drink, shes fun as hell. Hanging with her is a good time beyond sexual things. When she does drink, it's like a powder keg sometimes. I was kind of mulling over the idea of being a sold item then it all went to shit. There are a few other bumps that were kind of personal but this whole situation has me bummed out.

On a different note, I put out a writing project the other week, got interviewed via my friends and I's podcast about it, my ep jumped to top 4 out of all of our eps, which is like 42, I have another interview about it next Monday, and I'm playing a show with a friend next month.