My life would be incredibly different.

My work was robbed in 2010 and I was shot in the back and buttocks. One of the armed robbers was shot to death and another escaped and was never captured.

My life was a lot more different before that. I had friends, A social life, made good money, had a nice career, house.

PTSD changes you, I lost so much because of PTSD and chronic pain from being shot. I became a lot more angry, a LOT less social, bitter, and my personality changed so much my girlfriend of 8 years left me.

I also experienced crippling paranoia, hypervigilance to the point of exhaustion almost daily, and I'm a very heavy drinker now and almost exclusively stay at home. I may leave my house once a week if that to buy alcohol, food, and anything else I need around my house.

I honestly thought PTSD was not a real thing for soldiers before my work was robbed and I saw someone get shot to death a couple feet from me, Then experiencing someone trying to shoot me to death.

I deeply regret ever teased someone who claimed to have PTSD before that incident.

If I could go back and handle it differently I would have not let my guard down and not turned my back on those two people, At least If I had not been shot I would not have chronic pain and I could possibly still have the ability to work.