You wake up next to a pile of cat shit your pet left you as a gift.

'this always happens' you thing as you get out of bed to find you overslept and wet the bed.

You sigh and go to the bathroom to brush your teeth and take a shit, only to find that you are out of both toilet paper and toothpaste. Nothing ever goes right for you. You take your dump and try to flush. The toilet clogs. Great. you decide to leave it for later and step into the shower to clean your ass. Needless to say, you get scalded, slip, hurt your bum, then get frozen and are discovered 70 years later. Just kidding. It is cold, though. You did fall and you do have burns from tok hot water. Man, i'll remind you to never play the lottery.

you get your shirt and pants on. No underwear, since you have no clean ones left. Going commando today. You pull on your socks and go to get your shoes, only to step in anither gift from your cat. This one comes with a drink on the side, too. Oh well. No use cleaning up, it will only go wrong again. You step into your shoes that fit too tight and run off to get to work.

your AC is busted and the weatherman was wrong. Yay. its cold out now. All that needs to happen is rain. You left your umbrella at home, after all.

*jinxex it, you motherfucker. Jinxed it. The AC at work is always too cold, too. Damn it. Anyway, you were late and had to call about four people to get inside and clock in. Its not like you have any idea what to do, anyway. The boss failed to get you trained fir these calls. You are basically supposed to cold call until you get it right. The internet on your phone doesn't work, either. *

So you had to work a double shift. Your coworker had to call in sick and this place is understaffed. Double shift, no pay. Fucking hell.

you get in your shitty car to find that a couple of items you didnt really need too badly were stolen. Sigh. You drive home, cursing under your breath at people cutting you off. Today is a bad day. Just like any other.

You get home. Wife made meatloaf. Kid got in trouble. Cat shit everywhere but the litterbox. it is only now that you realise that you were probably cursed.

Also, you can't find that thorn in your sock.

you walk upstairs. There is one less step than you thought. At least you werent actually falling into an abyss.

you sit down on your now clean bed and eat a bag of chips before lying down and realising that you should not Have eaten chips on the bed.

Theres fucking dirt in your eye. "Fuck this shit" you say as you grab your gun, ready for a rampage. You dont have any ammo. Damn it.

Another shitty day