I'm vegetarian, and I don't give a fuck what you eat. People always ask what philosophy I follow that dictates I not eat meat: I have no such philosophy. I just don't eat meat. And I literally don't give a fuck what you eat.
I do think that vegans are somewhat low-hanging fruit, comedy-wise... veganism seems to attract the kind of people who do have philosophies about what they eat, and are often only too happy to inflict their beliefs on everyone else. The thing I never hear mentioned is: many people who eat meat have all the zealotry of believers in a philosophy, without having an actual philosophy... to them eating meat is just 'normal', so anyone who doesn't eat meat must be 'abnormal'.
Since nobody will ever make a "how meat eaters really act around vegetarians" video:
(1) Most people seem to think me not eating meat is an aggressive statement about them eating meat. It's not, it is just something I do. (See "I don't give a fuck what you eat", above. I don't give a fuck what you eat.) I'd like to blame this on shithead vegetarians and vegans, but it appears to run deeper than that... among people who don't live somewhere with a hugely subsidized and advertised meat industry - including people like my grandparents, who lived in the US before those subsidies and advertising campaigns came along - nobody gives a fuck what I eat. Which I appreciate, because I don't give a fuck what they eat.
(2) Colleagues at work and school tend to make a big deal out of how 'tolerant' they are of me being vegetarian. This manifests in many ways, but one stood out as particularly amusing the first few dozen times it happened:
We're working late, someone decides to order pizza. Someone remembers that I don't eat meat, recommends that one pizza be vegetarian so there will be something I can eat. The pizzas arrive, and one by one people come into the lab with a slice of vegetarian pizza in their hand, commenting about how it is "not really that bad". The rational side of my brain wants to point out that what they are eating is no different from any bite of the other pizzas that didn't happen to have a piece of pepperoni on it, but they always seem so proud of themselves for "expanding their boundaries" (direct quote) enough to eat stuff they already eat anyway and "tolerating" (ditto) me not eating meat. By the time I get to the pizzas the one vegetarian pizza is gone, the empty box surrounded by people beaming with pride after their recent daring adventure into the strange and perilous world of vegetarianism.
(3) There is always one person in the group who is deeply, personally offended that I don't eat meat, who makes a big show of ordering only meat and commenting on how good it is throughout the meal. Telling it how tasty it is. Asking it if it - the animal whose meat is being eaten - gets offended that some people won't eat its delicious, juicy flesh. Dripping said juices into their mouth while looking at me, or - if I have the misfortune of being seated near a complete asshole - flicking it onto my food. I don't give a fuck what you eat, but I do get more than a little embarrassed when otherwise-reasonable adults act like children.
(4) On occasion there is someone else who doesn't eat meat, who makes the mistake of assuming that I am on their 'side' because I don't eat meat. (Or someone else makes that assumption and enthusiastically introduces me to their other vegetarian friend, in much the same way nervous liberals start listing every black person they've ever met when they meet someone with black skin.) I don't give a fuck what they eat. I don't see why anyone should give a fuck what I eat. I don't understand why it is an issue at all. The strongest thing I feel about the whole eating/not eating meat issue is profound annoyance that anybody thinks it is an 'issue', or that I should care in the slightest what they eat, whether or not it is stuff I would eat. I don't give a fuck what you eat. I find the whole idea that anyone thinks there are 'sides' to this complete non-issue somewhat embarrassing.
I have friends who knew me for years before learning that I don't eat meat. And I know people who have literally brought it up every single time I have seen them after they discovered I don't eat meat. The latter rarely become friends, because I can't understand why they keep bringing it up. Or because they lump me in with the kind of assholes this video parodies, invariably without realizing that they are taking just as much of a 'side' by caring what I eat.