Can't believe I'm still awake. Just laying here thinking, and I feel like I probably made a similar ultimatum to my ex at one point because I was sick of the stress of instigating. I know it didn't help, but I personally didn't know how to keep beating a dead horse about what I wanted. Hopefully he hasn't stressed you out by saying what he said, I know I probably didn't make the situation better in retrospect.

I know at the time, I just wanted to feel wanted. I knew I could instigate, and I knew she said she wanted to but didn't know how to. I didn't need her to talk dirty.... honestly I just wanted some self esteem. I knew she enjoyed sex, but never felt like she wanted "me". Any sort of simple start to it would have felt amazing.

For instance touching me in a sensual way, just saying she wanted me, even just saying she wanted to have sex. I knew where to take it after feeling wanted, of hearing I was wanted. Or even telling me to slow down and tell me what she wanted, because that's one of the best parts to me. Knowing you are enjoying it and pleasured takes sex to a whole new level. I hope something I said helped....now I'm going to go back to Netflix and try to sleep! Thanks for reading my late night rambling.