In the same way that you can't go by what the fandom says about her, you can't go by what the fellow characters say about her either.

I disagree. What her fellow characters say is something written by Whedon, while what the fandom says is not. This isn't about whether Inara is a great character - she clearly is - it's about whether her as a Companion is a good example of Whedon writing in a feminist way.

We have Inara and Kaylee saying it is a respectable job, which is great. But then we have Book, Mal, and some secondary characters saying it is not. I don't have a problem with this dichotomy per se, but I do think that it undermines the claim that being a Companion is a highly respected job, as clearly that isn't a universal opinion.

I don't think it reflects well on Mal's character that he claims to love Inara but then repeatedly calls her a whore, when she makes it clear she sees her job as much more than that. But even still, I think that that conflict is fine as well, so long as one doesn't use Inara the extremely respectable Space Prostitute as an example of Whedon's feminist writing. Because the show makes it clear that the social status of Companions isn't straight forward; they might be able to get into a fancy party, but they could never marry into the aristocracy, and prostitutes who aren't Companions are treated very poorly. And Inara's main relationship on the show, with Mal, is one in which he repeatedly insults her and does things she has specifically asked him not to do. We don't see the characters around her treating Inara with a great deal of respect or deference, even though the way Companions are described, we might expect them to.