Yeah, can't say I am or ever was afraid of Arabs or Muslims, but I was 7 around 9/11 (old enough to feel the impact of my family's panic and fear and the subsequent changes in policy in the US, airport security, talk of anthrax and other things I didn't understand that sounded) and developed a horrible fear of airplanes. I lived in a military neighborhood where you could regularly hear jets flying by and until I was maybe 12 or 13 literally would scream and run to my mom crying (and often hyperventilating) when I'd hear them go by... several times a day. I went to high school near an airport and could hear take off and landings and would get really distracted and physically ill. Almost everytime I've flown, I've cried, even now at nearly 22. The times I haven't, it's been thanks to good ol' benzodiazepines (also for other anxiety because clearly my reactions to things aren't normal). Regardless, I'm throwing up, dizzy, and hysterical for days before a flight. I definitely remember these feelings being directly connected to thoughts of plane hijackings.

Part of my family is (non-Arab Muslim) so I wouldn't've really been put on the "Muslims are the worst" bandwagon after 9/11, but I definitely did get lingering effects from the atmosphere right afterwards.

Not saying what she did is ok, but I think it's plausible she was taking about how crazy it was for her to be so prejudiced at one point.

In direct response to the OP though, if I learned the Arab/hijab comments were from that, I could work past it. People, even people who like Arab culture, are very ignorant about it. I can think of a looot of not-so-tactful questions asked by sober students in Arabic classes. But I probably would be very very pissed at her getting too drunk to manage herself when meeting your family and I sure at HELL would not be able to get past the sexual comments.