Do you have children? Because if you have a son, someday he will masturbate. Will you see him as a bad individual? Would you want him to feel ashamed for doing something that is so natural for his gender? What about a daughter? Someday she will marry a man who has/does masturbate. She may even masturbate. Heaven knows I did as a teenager. Would you want her to view her husband as bad? I'd bet money your answer is no. Treat your husband and yourself the way you would want your children and their spouses to be treated.

I found out that my husband looked at porn occasionally and masturbated often since he was 14. We had been married for five years and it was our Bishop that took me aside and blindsided me with it because my husband was going through a faith crisis. My husband thought if he was forthcoming it would help him become more faithful (damn cullt). Our Bishop placed him on informal probation and constantly made a case for my leaving him. It threw me. It shook up my confidence in my husband and our life we had built. I confided in a good ex-mo friend who said something like this to me "Why would you throw the baby out with the bathwater. He is a good man. He loves and adores you and your child more than anything. He is a damn hard worker. He puts up with all of your crap. Love him because of his humanity. Love him for all of the things he is. What does this change? Nothing. He is the same man you were married to the day before you found this out, now you have a chance to know him a little better and love him a little more. Does he still want you? Yes. Does he still treat you well? Yes. Then don't ruin a good thing because some pious asshole with a God complex feels like he can punish your husband for being a man. Don't resent him for his basic biology that was given to him by (if there is one) God."

Best advice I've ever been given.