Sounds like massive control issues. Distance is the healthiest, as that helps you set boundaries.

Celebrate your own Christmas with your cats. It will be a lot more fun and relaxing than dealing with your mom. She's doing it to herself too, and she'll be kicking herself while blaming you these days. Don't take responsibility, this is her problem to deal with. Don't make it yours.

Consider that you're an adult and you're allowed to socialize. Life can be a lot more bearable in hard situations if you have people to laugh with and just cheer you up. That means you can leave your home at a lot of other times too. And it also means you're building on your Family of Choice. Your mom is your Family of Origin. There are a lot of people who have chosen life with a Family of Choice, because Origin made their world a worse place. A bigger network will help you in life, and then when one of the people withdraws their support, you don't feel completely abandoned.