Many people here are recommending a therapist, which i agree would be a huge step in helping you overcome this challenge. Therapists can be very helpful for you to feel like you have someone to talk/vent to, and make you feel like you are worth listening to. But thats the important part: feeling like you're worth something. Going to a therapist alone will not solve all your problems, but understanding the issues and problems you're faced with, and utilizing therapy as a tool to help you grow as an individual will be a huge step toward getting you where you need/want to go. I want you to know and feel that you have value as an individual, and the things that you're feeling depressed about do NOT define you as a person, but rather, are just experiences and opportunities that you can gain from. You parent doing well in school, are feeling unhealthy, etc. These things do not make you a bad person, or a person who is not valuable. These are just mistakes or missed opportunities maybe. Last semester i was unfocused, unmotivated, and slightly depressed myself. I ended up failing my Physics class. I'm retaking it right now and this entire semester i feel like I've made a huge step toward improving the things i was doing wrong (procrastinating, not paying attention in class, not working hard enough, etc.) All you need to do is refocus and re motivate yourself so that you can be in a position to succeed and feel like you are learning and growing. One thing I've found useful is trying to be more mindful. When you're doing something, anything at all, quickly ask yourself how its going to help you learn, how its going to help you grow, how its going to make a positive impact in your life. The key is taking baby steps and understanding that you wont become the most disciplined and happy person in one day. Life takes time, and patience is an extremely important and valuable trait we all need to work on. At the end of the day, nobody is perfect. We all have our flaws and misgivings, vices and insecurities. In NO way does that make you less valuable than me or anyone else. If we can only learn to work with our weaknesses, work ON them to turn them in to strengths, and understand that the joys of life are usually in the process and not the outcome. Try and enjoy what you're doing. Put your phone away in class. Get off snapchat, twitter, IG, Reddit. Don't reply to that text until after you've finished studying for that test or finishing that paper. Getting lost in work is an extremely satisfying thing. Maybe you don't like your classes/major. Don't sweat it buddy, its very easy and common to change your course while you're in college, thats basically what college is for. Trying new things and seeing what you like. But i want you to know that you are of value, and these things are not things you should be ashamed of. Accept the mistakes we all make, and start fresh. Be mindful, focus on your work, motivate yourself to study until you cant anymore. Obviously these things are easier said than done, which is where someone like a therapist comes in. He/she can help you gain some of these characteristics, but the attitude change/shift must be 100% voluntary and from within. You're only 18 my friend, there is plenty of time to fix things and get to where you need to go. Hope this was helpful and a positive addition to your day. I, like im sure all the other commenters in this post, would be very much obliged to help you further if you need it; don't hesitate to shoot a PM!