Theoretically we are free to select the type of people we care. We’re not being forced into this by social convention or dynastic imperatives. But at the same time, yeah, I agree ..somewhere in reality our choice is probably a lot less free than we imagine. A lot of things predisposes us to look in adulthood for people who won’t necessarily simply be kind to us, but who will – most importantly – feel familiar. Rather than seek to radically re-engineer our instincts, what we can do is try to learn to react to people in the more mature and constructive manner of a rational adult. Intentions behind the love you're getting matters a lot..doesn't matter what is its source..so hey, why not? Be a little humble and try to absorb the warmth. Not in a fake way, but as if you are a human and you need it. Cliche.. but it would be a whole lot better if we really accept the love we think we deserve.