Judgmental bullshit from someone who doesn't know us. My husband is more than okay with it - you keep skipping past the fact that it's his doing - he made me promise. On the subject of risk, he knows the risks of not handling it this way far outweigh any risk of my getting caught. Sex is extremely, extremely important to both of us. Unlike a lot of husbands, he doesn't want this to be a one-sided deal, where I act any role he wants in bed and do everything I can to please him, while I don't get what I need. We wouldn't be married if he hadn't proposed this solution. My husband insisted on this after we'd already agreed to marry. It had taken him years to persuade me to marry him, then after I said yes, he refused to commit to any date unless I promised I would seek other men if I needed it. He inserted the reference to our secret promises in our vows - that was the only one. He added the clause to our prenup saying if I were found to have committed an infidelity, it couldn't be held against me. He wants me to be happy, he has always known that big dick makes me happy, and he knows he can give me every other thing that makes me happy. As for his happiness, I am fully committed to doing every perverted or humiliating thing he wants in private, and dressing or acting any way he wants to in public. He truly enjoys all the other guys being so envious. He loves it when people think he's this stud with a big dick because of this image people have of me or brag about how he knocks me out every night, and I'm fine with people saying I'm sex crazed or a slut if it makes him happy. He just doesn't want to have the size thing thrown in his face that he doesn't measure up to what I need. He's told me again and again he couldn't stand it if he stood in the way of my being sexually satisfied. I already tried it your stupid way with my first fiancee, and it destroyed him. Your way is naive, childish, and stupid, and you don't know us.
What you don't understand is that no marriage is a perfect match on every attribute. Good spouses are willing to make sacrifices and compromises. I appreciate the sacrifices my husband makes, and he appreciates mine. My husband is the perfect man for me, and I know he truly believes I'm the only woman for him. Why else would he refuse a three-way he asked me to set up? Our marriage is filled with loving-kindness.
What you're basically saying is you know better than my husband. You don't. He's very wise. Sorry, you're being a judgmental fool.
Bottom line: We love each other and we're happy. You're jealous, bitter, and small in all the wrong ways. You need help.