This may not apply exactly but once I stumbled on my boyfriend's deeply personal reddit posts about him/me. My ex and I were in a long distance for a few months. Bored one day I got stoned and came up with the hilarious idea to PM him my tits anonymously, to see if he would recognize them...idk, I was high. Now that I think about it, who else would randomly PM tits? Anyways, this took a fairly dark turn. I remembered his reddit account was this inside joke and searched him. I genuinely had no intentions of snooping and never had before. We had a very healthy, trusting relationship, and I guess I figured he just posted about video games. Well the second I get to his account to message him, all I see are incredibly serious posts on /r/depression. He was deeply suicidal but said he wasn't sure if he could do that to me or his family. Said his dream scenario was getting a terminal illness. Lots of detailed, horrific insights into a totally secret world of pain, right at the top of the page. I knew he struggled with depression but never in that kind of detail. Also, I thought (he made us believe) that the worst of it was behind him. I didn't know what to do for a while, since it felt like an incredible betrayal of his privacy. It was like I had read his diary, but what if I said nothing and he acted on these thoughts? Eventually I sought advice from a mutual friend. This guy rolled with a different circle, and therefore wouldn't spread rumors or cause my ex any problems. A few months back the guy confided in me about taking antidepressants. I asked him what he would want if he were in my ex's shoes. Although my friend gave perfect advice, who knows if I actually handled this in a mature way. Talked to the ex and things seemed perfect for a while, then he slowly grew into a different person. He became much more cynical, sexist, and racist. His worse qualities were amplified; arrogant and withdrawn. The last few trips we took together had many tense moments, as though a brick wall were between us. I remember on our last weekend together we argued for hours about women in the military (???). This was not the man I dated for 3 years and lived with, it was a 14 year old boy. He ended up breaking up with me in a brutal way. We no longer speak, but I hope he's gone to therapy. I hope he doesn't continue to white knuckle it, pretending everything's perfect when he's rotting inside. I've moved on completely, but we were best friends once. I don't like to think of him in that bottomless pit alone.