Spouse and I didn't really have great childhoods. He was neglected in a lot of ways, and is only now catching up to his potential. I was helicopter parented and it messed me up.

We both have a lot of life to catch up on. Neither of us would like to quit our job and stay home to take care of the kids just yet.

So we'll need help with child care. We don't yet make enough to afford help. In case there are any complications with pregnancy or health, I wouldn't be able to work, and we can't afford that.

We'll end up having to rely on our parents to help. I don't want his mother helping because while she is very nice, she is very neglectful. I don't want my mother helping because she says very hurtful things and is a control freak and I don't want that anymore in my life.

Also, I have ADHD and find it very difficult to get things done as such. With a baby, it'll be impossible to get through the day. And I am scared of passing it on as well. Two ADHD people in one house would be insane.

I love children and I think my husband will be an excellent father, but we have gotten to where we are now together after a lot of effort and growth, and we don't want to go back to square one with a new arrival.