My most bone chilling experience would be when my sister attempted suicide. I never shared this information with anyone but my boyfriend. After reading everyone else's posts i feel like i can share mine.
I was a sophomore in high school. I was at a pep rally having fun when a kid from the office signaled me over and out of the building. He told me my parents were here to pick me up. I was excited i was expecting maybe a relative had came to town or maybe a fun event like bowling or something. (It was also Friday)
When i got in the car something was off. My dad was silent. He just told me she was in the hospital and she attempted suicide. I was shocked. I instantly disconnected everything felt numb and slow as if it were a movie or dream.
My father insisted we get food so we got jack in the box cause we might be there for hours until we get her transferred to a mental hospital. I remember so vividly sitting in the hospital parking lot in the car and eating a breakfast sandwich cause they confused my order. Just trying to process this was even real.
When we actually went in, for the first time in a long time i got to see her arms, because she was in a hospital gown. they were usually covered by long sleeves. They were covered in cuts and scars all over it was scary. I remember a few times asking about a few i saw that had slipped and she said it was "the cat" or "the woods" i was so naive i thought it actually was the woods or the cat. We talked to her a little bit and mostly sat in silence.
This is where i don't like to talk about it much. My parents felt they didn't want me to have to stay the entire time. Maybe let me stay home and process. My moms friend dropped me off at home. Now i had asked "what about a note" "there was no note" and i thought "thats bullshit". I lifted up her pillow and there it was. Me home alone and the only one getting to read the suicide note. I read it. I was heart broken yet at the end of the page it said "if you read this burn it". My parents aren't the best i was extremely depressed as well and they caused a lot of damage. They LOVE to make fun of tragedy. If i showed it to them they would have constantly made fun of my little sister for it. For trying to escape. I couldn't have that. So i burned the note. I found the knife she used to harm herself and washed the blood off of it and hid it.
I sat down and wrote her a long and colorfully made letter telling her if she is scared or sad she comes to me. I was there for her.
What was very scary what still gets me was the night before. We are both introverts we don't hang out a lot and when we do its an occasion kinda deal. Its not that we hate each other we just both feel awkward. Well that night she came up and sat next to me was pleasant. It felt weird i thought it was weird at the time she did that. We talked eventually it got late and i needed to head to bed for school tomorrow. So she went to the bathroom. I could see the door. I think thats when she tried to OD. Left casually and went to bed.
My parents found out because she panicked and told them later that day (next morning) what she did. She had no kidney or liver damage. Which was a miracle.
To this day those images, those moments haunt me. Im so happy shes alive in fact to this day she has no new cuts she has good friends shes talked to me about her problems it couldn't be better. I will never forget reading that note and washing that knife. Seeing her get sent off to a mental hospital.
She still has that note i made her in her drawer next to her bed.