It's not silly to feel like this, so please dont criticize yourself. Your feelings are valid and they are yours. You did the right thing, you could have spent thousands and thousands more but there was still no guarantee and still more stress and hurt for her. You did the right thing, you did what you could. You did your best at the time and she knows that. You know she loves you unconditionally and she understands and she would be so so grateful you chose to be her dog-mumma and for all the time you spent with her. Know that she is stil with you, and she wouldn't want you to be upset.. you have to know this 100%. They always want us to be happy.. They are our little mates, our best friends, that bond can never be broken. Cherish the fun times and be grateful for the moments you spent together, and know that she also chose you. It takes time but I promise it will get better. Sending you love and light x