Thank you for this. Me and one of my besties went through this together, with the same former friend. Eventually I decided I had enough in September last year, and I told him to just get he Hell out of my life, because all he did was lie to me and use me (and her) and I just wanted to spend my time with him so I'd just disregard all of it. And each time I opened my mouth to say what bothered me, he managed to make me feel like I was the crazy one for feeling the way I did, and that I was the irrational one, despite him abusing my friend. Luckily we all only talked across the internet, I don't want to think what he would have done if all three of us were actually within physical reach of each other. It was hard to make the decision to leave, and I needed more of my friends to encourage me and keep telling me that I was doing the right thing. My friend did as well. Since then, both of us got better, but I understand she still has triggers because of certain things he's done to her, and even with me, the slightest mention of the country where he was from, or reading anything containing any word associated with him in my mind is like being punched in the gut. We know we have to let go, and we are steadily getting better, but on rare occasions we still bitch about him. Oh well. Nothing that came out of is was all bad though. My friend had a bit of trouble being assertive, but after all this happening, and with my support, she's actually doing amazing now. So I guess it really was a necessary lesson.