I've been feeling really unheard within the relationship and that my bids for connection are often missed. I don't feel like I'm special when I'm around him, in the way that some of my family and friends make me feel. He's a smoker and drinks a lot more than I do. He has a big thing about not wanting to He told what to do (even minor things, and things I wouldn't consider as someone telling you to do something). Has been in several relationships and ended them all, usually citing things like just being done with it/feeling it was over, with no clear reason to break up apart from that. He can be very selfish and considers himself in almost all decisions, rather than what's good for the relationship. I tend to support him more in the relationship since he says I know exactly what to say and how to comfort him, whereas I don't feel he can do the same for me.

Otherwise he is a kind person. Very intelligent, honest, reliable, hospitable, talented, has a loving family, a desire to help the world, is adventurous and very generous. He follows through on commitments, stays true to his word. He's very affectionate and caring. He likes to plan dates and fun things for us to do. Is keen for me to apart of his life. He is easy going and has a unique lens and perspective on life, that's more flexible and fluid than my own. I trust him. There is a very strong physical attraction between us. He can be shy and it's endearing.