I tried once - about four years ago - by taking a lot of pills. I sat in my basement of the townhouse my girlfriend and I had at the time. She was out of town. I was lonely, I had been drinking, and I was sad. I grabbed the bottle of prescription medication I took for panic attacks. I must have swallowed a dozen. I lit a cigarette and got out my cell phone and dialed 911. I told them my name, my address, and what I had just done. The dispatcher tried to ask me a question but I just hung up. At least they would find the body that night, and my girlfriend wouldn't come home and stumble upon me on her own several days later.
The next thing I remember is waking up in what appeared to be a hospital room, with a very pretty girl standing at the door. She was a nurse. I was in the psychiatric ward of the hospital. They were going to keep me there for 48 hours for observation.
What a boring place. I tried to sleep as much as possible to pass the time. I was a smoker. They don't allow new patients the privilege of going outside during the first 72 hours. I had to use a nicotine inhaler. They are lousy. Nothing compared to the real thing.
They made me see a therapist. I was never big into therapists. I was ashamed of myself. It was uncomfortable to speak to them. This one was different. This was a man who changed my entire outlook on life. How I view myself, others and the world around me are shaped by the simple conversations I had over the next couple days.
My 48 hours was up. I was free. I continued to see the therapist for the next while. I looked forward to visits. For the first time in my life I was making a commitment to change.
I write all of this because of this very man. This doctor of the mind. He taught me to see the value of myself. He showed me how much my family cared for me and how my struggles with addiction were holding me back from my full potential.
Fast forward several years later and I have a very solid job in a brand new city with an even greater sense of optimism for the future. I was so low, and brought back so high by a simple, kind hearted, realistic therapist.
I can't thank him enough. I will never forget Dr. Greg 'Leg Ion' Willis. Funny story how he got that name.