You left him to lead the eat pray love lifestyle. I'm sorry to say but no amount of traveling and living independently, or sleeping with interesting people, will really help you "find yourself" or "grow" in much of a positive way. This is all a bunch of nonsense that millions of women are buying into these days. you could grow up in a small town, marry young to a great man, and live in the town for the rest of your life and still be filled with character, intellect, have great morals, and die happy.

The problem is, in modern society we are taught to hunt for novelty, to never be satisfied with consistency or stability, to be narcissists. But this is ultimately what makes most people so unhappy. It is the root cause of serial monogamy. Always trying to upgrade to the "next" thing because you're "bored".

I'm not going to say it was a bad idea to break up with your boyfriend, because it might be a great thing for you. All I'm try to warn you of is to not get stuck in this novelty loop that so many people do. Not only will it not lead to happiness, it has been shown to wear away your ability to pair bond in the long term. And although this may be a contentious thing to say, it is true that the older you get as a woman, and the more past partners you've had, the less likely you will be able to get commitment from a quality guy. So, your fear about dying alone with 50 cats has somewhat of a root in reality.

Sorry for not mindlessly giving you the "you go grrrrl!" response you may have been fishing for.

My advice to you: find a good, confident, and masculine man, who you are attracted to and makes you feel like a woman, and do everything you can to get commitment and love from him before you crap away your last precious years of fertility.