I feel the same as you re: adding aid after aid, especially harsher ones. I had a similar issue years back with the quick squeeze, and eventually realized a quick squeeze for me was just a more intense squeeze with the very back part of my heel. So, basically, instead of squeezing with my lower calf-to-heel area as I normally would (I usually always kind of 'hug' them with the lower leg when urging forward etc.), I will instead focus the squeeze in *just* my inside heels and do it a tad more intensely than usual. I don't bow my legs out or anything to do this, I just focus the pressure I want to convey right into my heels only. That way it's more of a 'knuckle between the ribs' feeling than a hugging squeeze. I release as soon as the horse responds, I feel like this helps them to have that aha moment of 'this type of squeeze means pick up the pace,' etc.

If your horse is still slow to this, then when used properly, rounded end or soft touch spurs are like a more concentrated version of this squeeze! It focuses the pressure in one precise area. I think of it like concentrated juice, I can dilute it as much as I want to get the perfect flavor that works for me. So you can start super gentle and work up to the perfect pressure point for your horse to respond to :)