The idea that if it smells like hot everywhere you go you should check your shoe. Half the time if it smells like shit every where you go it's because the group/s (coworkers/family/friends, etc) you hang in have shit on their shoes. This won't stop everyone from turning on you if you dare to call them on it and becoming better people while painting you as crazy so no one ever belives you because they all seem so great with their shit together (because they help eachother) while pushing you out to always have trouble having anyone because anyone you meet believes "it must be you." With the "good" people usually finding every opportunity to meet any new people in your life and turmthem over to their side showering with kindness and acceptance and "of course we are all so great look at how wrong that person is, let's make them feel even more alone for not accepting our greatness together now ." Unless you pick up and move to a new country often times you can't leave these groups because it's your life long church or you longterm job or your family or fried circle you've had since middle school. Even if you do its like you're being punished now for challenging them to be better people even if you technically win and they do be better they will pretend they were just always like that and never credit anything to you while mistreating you for life now unless you bow and say you are wrong to them begging their forgiveness. People are manipulative prideful a holes who will throw you out first chance to make them selfsame look better if you're making them look bad.