So, there I was with this pretty brunette I had no idea I had shot with, making out in my friend's back yard at night, while his birthday party is going on.

The place is super dark, and I can barely see anything, which was fine, because at least I was going to get to feel something, since seeing something was already part of my routine for sometime. I was a rookie, 16-year-old-know-it-all who thought that was playing the game, but didn't even exist in the universe to begin with.

The girl was a few years older than me, and now I know that she had experience, way more than I did, way more than any girl I had ever met, I mean, she pulled my pants down with only two movements and I was wearing a belt.

So, there I was closing my eyes and enjoying the moment.

One of the "sexy" things girls say when they're having sex in Brazilian Portuguese is "dog", they call the guy a dog. It's a compliment. So, that's what she said.

She repeated, but this time, she did while stepping away from me.

Yup, that's it, there was a dog behind me.

It wasn't my friend's. The dog just stood there in a part of the yard that was brighter, looking at both of us while seated, as if he was asking: "what you're doing?" with his tongue out.

I turned back to her and said that it was alright, the dog wasn't big and he didn't seem like he was going to do anything to us. She asked me to go somewhere else. I insisted that we didn't need to while also trying to telling him to go away. She told me we had all night and went back in smiling.

Here is the problem. Just a few seconds after she went in, my friend and two other dudes just came from the other side of the yard, and...

there I was...

pulling my pants up right next to the dog that had his tongue out.

I moved out of that city two months later.