Swinger here. The absolute worst is when a woman puts on her best performance and puts me in a situation where I’m like “look il stomp on the breaks right now nobody wants to do anything unless all four of us…” and she says “nooooo hey I’m nervous and my mom needs eggs and my cats studying for his bar exam and curling iron is going through a break up and …..” and then I’m in a body …..looking at the fakest smile this side of love is blind season 3 wondering why the fuck I didn’t just say “hey babe I know they’re both into it and I’m too drunk to drive but this chick is already googling divorce lawyers” but it’s too late, cuz if I don’t pretend to enjoy this tragic bachata dance then the guy who feels 17 again in my wife is gonna get mad, my wife whose enjoying watching this chick squirm is gonna get on her bullshit , and I’m gonna have to take the brunt of “it’s me , you don’t find me attractive” and yeah I might have in another situation but here I am letting you talk me into your martyr rape. I have planned fantasy football drafts , work presentations, Christmas lists , and vacations budgets inside of unhappy wives. Communication.