Married her. We started dating in highschool and been together for 10 years now, last two years married. Things have been up and down for us for awhile now and it didn't help when she cheated on me six months ago. But i can't really blame her, because i wasn't emotionally or physically available for her for years. As someone here already said, i also started guessing my feelings, if I really knew what love was or if I was missing out being with other people or what I wanted in life as I've never dated or been with anyone else. She had dated some guys before me but we were each others first and only. I kind of distanced myself and as my wife put it, we were like roommates but without the benefits (didn't have sex for like a year). She did try to work thing out but eventually gave in on the temptation. This makes the missing out part even harder.

But after all this drama, i realised a good relationship needs work. Crazy thing is, i love her more than ever. I really opened up after that (maybe too much at first), we talked things through and i'm honestly happy with where i am right now. Only thing worrying me is, that my wife confessed she has physical attraction issues with me (maybe it's always been the case but didn't realise it after the cheating). She also thinks maybe sex is overrated anyways (touche on me, as I thought that once) or maybe the attraction will come back.

It's always been a little difficult turning my wife on for sex but i never gave it any thought. Maybe that's why i lost my interest in the first place, as I never really felt sexually wanted. Now that she experienced that excitement somewhere else, i'm worried she'll never have that with me and now she has someone to compare me to.

I really do love my wife, shes a good person, shes funny, beautiful and we are great together but the physical part really bums me out sometimes. I'm still hopeful, as things are getting better. Sorry for the wall of text but I needed a little vent. I have no friends and writing it all down sometimes helps.