This was back in college. A friend and his younger brother came over for thanksgiving weekend and we decided to have 2 shots of every type of alcohol I had (whiskey, tequila, vodka, rum) and then quickly run to Red Box and back, his brother just goes right to sleep. So we make it back and are 20min into the movie when he falls asleep. 10min later he gets up and walks to my doorway which is a 5ft hallway with a mirror and glass table. He's not saying a word and bends down a bit so I figure he's just stretching or something. NOPE. He pulls his pants/underwear down to his ankles and starts to pee, now I can't exactly push him because it would get everywhere and he's very muscular. I try to wake his brother up to help me and that doesn't work either. I'm trying to yell at him without waking up my parents (we're back in town for Thanksgiving) and it doesn't work. Then he waddles back and leans against the wall facing the mirror and squats. He begins to TAKE A SHIT on my floor. Now at this point I realize he's sleepwalking (he had done this a few times in the dorms). He is able to push me back and yell at me to leave him alone but I could still tell he wasn't really there, it wasn't just being drunk. I didn't want to start wrestling him out the door and get covered in shit so I just stand their in awe. He finishes and starts walking across the house, smearing the poop/pee with his pants to the floor, and up the stairs. He goes into the first room at the top (my parent's) and my dad is freaking out pointing a glock 23 at him and asking me what's going on. I explain, as he goes and sleeps on my parents bed, kicking my dad out (my mom was out of town, thank God, because she's a huge germaphobe). I try to ask my dad to not go downstairs and I'll handle it but he quietly walks down and starts to clean the floors with bleach. I assumed he was pissed and I slept on the couch by the door rehearsing what I'd say to my friend in the morning. Morning comes and he wakes me up and has no memory of anything, I tell him what happened and he didn't believe me. I tell him to go check the front of the house for all the rags used to clean the mess. My dad walks in from the garden as if nothing happened either. My friend was so embarrassed he grabs his brother and they leave right away on their 10hr drive back home. We are still great friends, but my parents think staying in the same room as him risks being murdered while he sleepwalking.
TL;DR- My friend comes over to my house for Thanksgiving. Gets drunk, sleepwalks, pees/shits all over our floor and then smears it all the way across the house and upstairs into my parents bed.