The distance never bothered me, that part I can do over and over again. It's when we were finally living back in the same city, where he had every opportunity to build our relationship, he would let me down. I had just moved to the city and found a job within a couple of weeks, although it felt like it took forever. He hadn't found, or thought he needed a job in about 8 months because he got a monthly stipend from the government. So I paid for everything, which wouldn't have been a problem, but he started asking me to supply him with alcohol and cigarettes. Things he couldn't afford and I did not want to purchase, resentment was building. I found his pipe for the first time since moving here, knowing he knows how I felt about him smoking weed (I hated it), more broken trust. Another month or so went by and he still can't get a job and I'm getting tired. I no longer feel warm in his caress, I no longer look at him and think about doing anything together. Because he doesn't work or do anything he's also putting on weight, he's losing his appeal to me. Everyday I begin to think how much happier I would be without him. I tell my friend and she tells me that she can hear that I've made my decision, my mind is confused though. I spent 4 years with that man and one December evening last year, I saw him post to r/trees and that night I made the decision to end it. That it wasn't worth fighting anymore. I was tired and the love we had had died months before. I was prolonging the end because I thought we could work through it but it takes two to make a relationship. Been significantly happier ever since and I am loving reconnecting with myself!!