My boyfriend broke up with me exactly two weeks ago. I'm in a lot of pain too; I understand what you're feeing. I know he loved me and I know during our breakup that he still loved me. Our futures didn't align. I didn't want to wait until I was in my mid-thirties to start a family. He didn't want to get married until after he became a physician, which means that I would have to wait for over ten years.

We often had reservations about this, but I was never strong enough to let him go. In some ways, I guess that I appreciate him for being able to be the one strong enough to initiate our break up. I understand that there may have been other reasons as well, but ultimately, our futures weren't compatible. Timing was always off for us. He was my best friend. I love him so much; haha we were so goofy together. Even now, as I'm typing this, I feel like crying. I tried to be angry at him, but I can't find sources of anger within myself to direct towards him.

I even told him that I was willing to marry later, and that I didn't want children until later. It wasn't enough, and when I look back, it wasn't true. I'm so sorry lilquichemoney that you're going through this, because I'm going through it as well and it kills. But right now, I want to care for myself. I want to put myself first and start to pick up the parts of my heart that this relationship shattered. I will not be talking to him in the future-- no contact. I love seeing people post about their pain and hardship from breakups on Reddit only to see that their posts were from "5 years ago" because it shows me that I'm not alone and that time continues on.

I know that we will both get better with time. I know both of us will be okay.